What To Do About Bullying: Tips For Parents

1. Encourage your child to report bullying incidents to you:
• Validate your child's feelings by letting him/her know that it is normal to feel hurt, sad, scared, angy, etc.
• Let your child know that she/he has made the right choice by reporting the incident(s) to you and assure your child that she/he is not to blame.
• Help your child be specific in describing bullying incidents: who, what, where, when. (Look for patterns or evidence of repeated bullying behaviors.)

2. Ask your child how she/he has tried to stop the bullying:

3. Coach your child in possible alternatives:
• Avoidance is often the best strategy.
• Play in a different place.
• Stay near a supervising adult when bullying is likely to occur.
• Look for ways to find new friends.
• Support your child by encouraging him/her to extend invitations for friends to play at your home or to attend activities.
• Involve your child in social activities outside of school.

4. Treat the school as your ally:
• Share your child's concerns and specific information about bullying incidents with appropriate school personnel.
• Work with school staff to protect your child from possible retaliation.
• Establish a plan with the school and your child for dealing with future bullying incidents.

5. Encourage your child to seek help and to report bullying incidents to someone she/he feels safe with at the school:
• Adult in charge of a specific activity or area (such as the playground, lunchroom, field trips, bus lines, gym, classroom).
• Teacher.
• Counselor.
• Principal.

6. Encourage your child to continue to talk with you about all bullying incidents:
• Do not ignore your child's report.
• Do not advise your child to physically fight back. (Bullying lasts longer and becomes more severe when children fight back. Physical injuries often result.)
• Do not confront the child who bullies.
• Do not confront the family of the child who bullies.